you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
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