your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
i really appreciated the lovely drunk rendition of whitney houstan's "i wanna dance with somebody" you left on my voicemail.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
It's fucking 2020, I should be able to watch Netflix in the buff while making brownies without you getting preachy about it.
Randomize
