his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
Randomize
