You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
You leaned over to me in the elevator and whispered "how long do I have to pretend to be sober?"
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
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