I showed him my bush... on skype.
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
Im just a social blackout drinker.
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
Randomize
