I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize
