Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
When I'm drunk and can't pee, I sing my abc's in my head and try to pee before I get to pee. Last night I forgot to do it in my head
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
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