if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
Things found in my vomit last night: cell phone, Von Hayes rookie card, a boot, my dignity
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
A giant panda just asked me for a cigarette and said "man pandas gotta smoke too." There is something wrong with this place.
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
Randomize
