Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Randomize
