so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
We named our party play list daddy issues
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize
