Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
Tonight, I'm planning on being a bigger trainwreck than Britney Spears circa 2007.
my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
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