i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
In sex ed. they really need to include a lesson on saying tampon in foreign languages, just in case.... Trying to ask the woman at the reception desk, who barely speaks English, for one just turned into an awkward game of charades.
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
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