she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
I'm always down for nudity.
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
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