you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
I'm sorry I keep drunk texting your boyfriend sports updates.
That's okay. He needs friends too.
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
Randomize
