Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(586): View more from Michigan

Don't forget I'm 20 now

(1-586): View more from Michigan

I liked you more when you were 19

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(610): View more from Pennsylvania

Where did you get a picture of my penis

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(727): View more from Florida

There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.

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(330): View more from Ohio

I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call

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(817): View more from Texas

Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.

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(570): View more from Pennsylvania

Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.

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(917): View more from New York City

You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard

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(818): View more from California

By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.

(925): View more from California

Stay hydrated

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(509): View more from Washington

Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?

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