I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
Randomize
