I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
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