If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
My crowning drunk achievement from that night was donating $5 to the Obama campaign.
You're perfect
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
Just got hit on by a 28-year old, quadraplegic, triple-cancer-survivor redneck. Now updating bucket list to meet newfound standards.
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
Randomize
