He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
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