She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize
