Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
Randomize
