my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize