I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
Randomize
