I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
Best thing I ever did was get a dog. She's like a living trip alarm to warn me of visitors while I'm masturbating.
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
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