Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
Sometimes, when I pour the powdered creamer in my coffee I like to pretend it's Colombian grade cocaine.
That's the kind of morning coffee a girl could welcome the day with.
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
Randomize
