sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
I am one with the molecules
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
Randomize
