Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
She tied me up with her honor cords...
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
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