are you still at the devil's house?
What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
