Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
Drunk yoga at 11 am turned into me sitting on the couch making fun of the girl in the instructional video. By the way, what the fuck is a third eye?
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
Randomize