You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
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