There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
turns out Discover card thinks that if you spend $450 at four different liquor stores in one evening that the card "must have been stolen"
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
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