4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
and then I told her I was too drunk. She started to cry, and told me this always happens to her and that she thinks shes ugly. I pretended I was asleep and then she farted.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
Randomize