I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
