He is such a slut. More and more my type.
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
Randomize
