WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
I told him he was a man of science and that he should conduct experiments on my tits to see how they stay up. I need you to hold onto my larynx when I'm drunk.
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
Btw I puked in your glovebox
Randomize