seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
that is very illegal...i love you.
Randomize
