: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
When I start carrying a bottle in my hand, jumping from boat to boat with a grenade horn. YOU should know this isn't going to turn out well.
Everyone already knows you're a drunk, they understand.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
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