dude i'm inner monologue high
It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
If I hear the phrase 'these unprecedented times' one more time I'm putting my foot up someone's ass.
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