You just made me feel so damn special
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
Randomize
