I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
composition of my stomach right now: 60% C8H10N4O2 * H2O (coffee), 20% CaCO3 (pepto bismol/tums), 10% HCl (stomach acid), 5% fried rice, 5% residual adderall. i can do that by percent mass too. fuck you finals.
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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