I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
some girl just asked me if I was that guy that hooked up with nine girls in one night. officially a local celebrity. gonna try and autograph her boobs.
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
Randomize
