the family i'm sitting with looks like the Addams family. Except for the daughter...she looks like Shrek
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
Randomize
