i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
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