i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
