and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
The best walk of shames are on the highway
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