Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
At the ER, will you come pick me up... Had an allergic reaction, wanted to see if I could eat a peanut without dying... Do you how bad this is evolutionary, I would have died back in the days of survival of the fitest by now
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
Randomize
