problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
Randomize
