: I need to find myself a plastic surgeon husband so i can get boobs.
but u need boobs to get one in the first place.
Why don't I have your new number? And who have I been texting?
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
He texted me saying that his mom found my nuva ring in their jacuzzi filter. I don't think I'm welcome back anytime soon.
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
