Someone shit on the floor
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
