dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
Randomize
