At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize
